So you’ve made it – got your dream man, got married, he is yours. Getting a man is not that hard (usually) but how to keep him pursuing you? I know, if he is a Godly man, he will love you no matter what, but there are some simple things you can do to keep a man interested for a lifetime. Because sparks are there for a while on their own, and then you need to work for them.
The tips that I’m about to share with you, sister, are purely in addition to a healthy way of maintaining your marriage. Communication, quality time, focus on God and intimacy are the foundations of a successful relationship. Yet, if you can do a thing or two to make him obsessed with you, why not use it once in a while? 😉
To be clear – this is not manipulation! It’s just using the knowledge about men’s psychology, hormones, and relationship dynamics to elevate the passion in a marriage. Take them as a guideline to add some spice to your marriage, NOT to build it up. If the foundations are not there, these tricks will do nothing.
So here you go, your ultimate guide to keep a man interested for a lifetime:
Testosterone and Other Weird Words
Don’t worry, I am not going to bore you with theoretical terms and biology stuff. I’ll tell you the practical things you need to know about men’s hormones. So, look, guys need to pursue. It’s in their genes – when they want to “get” a woman, the testosterone goes super up. He fights for you, takes you on fancy dates, behaves like a true gentleman, etc.
Then, after you’ve been “got” and the time passes, he starts bonding with you. During bonding different hormones get active. They are good and needed hormones as well, bonding time is magical and makes you two become best friends for life. BUT a lot of women get confused why the pursuing time suddenly stopped or got limited.
Luckily, our Godly men know better than that. A wise Christian man will still actively pursue you, no matter how long you are married. But of course, you can help his testosterone to go up again once in a while 😉
There are four ways you can achieve that, and the bonus one. Of course, everything with moderation and wisdom. But I know you are a smart woman and you will make good use of these tips.
So the first thing you should do to keep a man interested for a lifetime is…
Have Your Own “Things”
When we get married, we become one. But we are still two individual people, so doing literally everything together robs a marriage of sparks and takes away the time when you could miss each other.
That’s why you must keep your hobbies, girlfriends, and small rituals. If you’ll have at least one sphere of life that you don’t share with your man fully, then you will remain interesting to him. You can tell him all about your dance practice or women’s sewing group. It does not matter what kind of hobby it is. Forget the idea of being “mysterious” – it can be overwhelming. It is enough if you have a thing or two that you truly enjoy on your own.
Marriage is your priority. But if you recharge your batteries on your own then you can give more of yourself to your partner. And then he will still feel an urge to pursue you. Because you are not only his wife, you are still a freaking interesting woman that he wants to get to know better and better. Give him a space to do so 😉
We tend to forget what we used to like once we got married. But hey, your husband fell in love with you being you. It’s smart to take some time to explore yourself, enjoy some small pleasures, and invest some time into a new hobby. You will grow as a person and your relationship will benefit from it, too. Staying yourself – that’s essentially how you can keep a man interested for long years.
Go Away for a Day or Two
The sad reality is – the longer we are with each other, the more used to we become. We don’t want it, but sometimes we just take each other for granted. That’s why it is healthy to once in a while create a missing space. Go on a weekend trip with your girlfriends, visit family, travel. Of course, I am not recommending you disappear and cut yourself off. You can text your man and stay in touch, but when you are separated physically for a short time, your marriage can improve.
The sparks will come back, you will feel like in a dating stage and your man will want to pursue you again. Being glued to each other 24/7 can become overwhelming. Missing each other naturally strengthens the relationship and lets you appreciate each other more.
After doing long-distance dating, every time one of us leaves we feel super connected and we appreciate that we have each other. So girl, make him miss you!
Marriage trips are also a brilliant way to keep a man interested. You can get separated from the house and daily issues and just focus on each other. It does not need to be a long or expensive trip – one night in a hotel can bring back the excitement and sparks 😉
Make Him Feel Like a Man
There is no bigger turn-off in a marriage than a woman with masculine energy. The more feminine you become, the more like a man he can feel, and… the more he pursues you!
In modern society and the confusion around feminism, it is hard to find the balance. But do you really prefer to struggle, be dominant, worry about provision, and claim that “you don’t need a man”? Well, certainly your man does not want you to start behaving that way.
We, women, take unnecessary burdens on ourselves. These burdens are not even ours to carry! So if you want to keep a man interested, the best thing you can do is to… let him be a man. Let him protect you – if he says he can drive you to the meeting when it’s dark, don’t roll your eyes and say you’ll go by bus. When he is giving you his coat, do not pretend like you’re not freezing. If he offers his help, do not get offended.
I know it’s way harder to say than to do, but try to relax and place yourself into a feminine energy. The more feminine you become in manners, behavior, and attitude, the more manly he will grow next to you. And this will help him pursue you all the time!
Wear Pretty Things
Men are visuals. That’s the truth and nobody can change that.
Of course, I’m not saying he will not love you any more if you wear sweatpants. But if you at least once in a while put something sexy/beautiful/different just for him, your marriage will benefit from it a lot. It seems like just clothes, yet if he sees you take care of yourself for him… sparks are guaranteed.
That’s another point on which I disagree with feminists. I’ll always keep the motto: “Stay pretty for your man!”. Even if he sometimes does not appreciate it verbally, believe me, it means a lot to him.
Dressing up was natural for you during the dating stage, wasn’t it? So if you want him to pursue you like he used to, pretty clothes can bring the dating stage back in a sense. So little effort, yet can make such an impact. That’s funny, but it’s true. Pretty clothes can keep your man interested for a lifetime!
Keep a Man Interested In Your Personality
The last thing you can do is to work on yourself. Today’s world offers so many materials for you to become a better wife, homemaker, and partner. Use them! Grow as a woman and your relationship will grow as well.
And do not worry – you are so interesting that even without these tips you can keep a man interested. So work on yourself and your marriage, but do not feel any pressure.
Just enjoy the ride!