Some people wait for years before getting married – but we didn’t 🙂 And believe me, it was SUCH a good decision! Maybe you have been dating somebody for a while now, but you are not sure if getting married young is something you should go into.
Marriage is one of the most important decisions you will ever make and you should think it through carefully. Well, but not too long 😉
Well, I Am Not Sure Though…
Let’s cover the basics – if you are not sure you want to spend the rest of your life with this person, don’t. Seriously. If now, at the dating stage, you do not like and crush this person enough, marriage will not help it.
Do you know this saying – You know when you know? I heard it a long time ago and did not sense the meaning behind it… till I met Alex. Then I knew.
But when on earth do you know that you know? Oh, that’s a great question! This magical knowing of which the quote talks about is not a feeling for example “Oh my! These eyes! Man! I know it’s him!”. Or “He is so cute and kind!”. Nah nah. These are good things to look for and I can understand why – yup, I am obsessed with my husband’s eyes and was ever since I saw him for the first time.
BUT! This knowing goes deeper than into emotions – it gives you this unreplaceable inner peace. “I see he has deep values and loves God and I want to be with him. I know”.
If months pass and there is still some voice in your heart that whispers “Hm…” then there are two possibilities. One – you’re looking for perfection or two – you do not want to marry this guy.
Does Life End With Marriage?
Oh my gosh, now! It starts then!
I’ve heard too many times that marriage is a cage and after that, there is only bitterness and regret. What a sad misconception!
Think about it this way. All blessings and curses of the young age, for instance, first job, first apartment, moving out from home, learning how to budget and navigate the adult’s life… what if you two could go through it together, as a team?
It is easier to grow old (and grow up!) together! The first firing, first rude bosses, and financial issues are not that scary anymore.
And oh my gosh, you’ll think I’m weird – or maybe not? 😉 Getting married young is awesome because of one more reason. Sex!
Don’t blush, I am being totally honest. Freshness, physical stamina, and this young and mad appetite for each other… instead of fighting countless temptations and keeping yourselves pure for years, you can explore this fantastic gift from God so early by getting married young.
Reasons Why Getting Married Young Is a Great Idea:
- Life is simply easier when you have your best friend by your side from the very beginning of adolescence.
- You go through all the tough and blissful firsts together.
- Getting married young is easier to adjust to – the older you get, the more you get used to being alone, living alone, planning alone, etc.
- You lower sexual temptations because you can start intimate adventures with your spouse at a young age.
- Getting married young allows you to have more time to grow together and build a lifetime longing foundation.
- You are settled – you do not need to wonder year after year if you will ever find somebody or start a family.
- You grow as an individual way faster getting married young – you need to care for another human being.
- Your sense of responsibility is high and it influences pretty much every sphere of your life.
- You can dream big! Moving out to Hawaii? Building a hotel? Winning MasterChef for couples (they should create such a series)? Dreaming together and planning together the big, lifetime goals has more power – two heads are more than one 🙂
- You’re unwrapping one of the best gifts from God without waiting.
Let me explain to you in detail how practically you can benefit from each reason for getting married young.
Life Is Easier
Even the Bible says in Ecclesiastes 4:11: “And if two lie together, they shall warm one another: how shall one alone be warmed?”.
Speaking from a cold practical perspective, it is easier even financially.
I am not saying you should consider getting married young because of money, not at all. Yet making your first money in a team of two is more supportive and encouraging than struggling to make ends meet alone.
Also, you have emotional support early in life. It’s like gaining a roommate who is your lover too!
You Go Through Firsts Together
Imagine that you do not have to go through anything scary, painful, disappointing or simply new alone ever again. First apartment, first job, first car – it will create unforgettable memories for you two.
Getting married young allows you to have your friend by your side in the union so you can learn how to live as a team.
I do think that growing old together is romantic and lovely, yet imagine not only that but also growing up with somebody.
From high school sweethearts to old lovers like from The Notebook at once!
It Is Easier to Adjust If You Are Getting Married Young
I am not saying adjusting to life with another person is not possible after some age, yet it is simply easier when you do it after getting married young.
As we know, marriage requires us to sacrifice, change, and compromise – if you haven’t been living on your own for too long, this process might not be as hard for you.
The more rooted you are in your rhythm of days and habits, the harder it will be for you to understand the other person and therefore adjust for them.
Sharing a living space is not easy itself! If you move in together and start making rules as a team, this might be smoother than you’ve imagined.
You Lower Sexual Temptations
Do not get me wrong – if you struggle with inappropriate sexual behaviors, marriage will not solve it.
Yet, opening the magical door to the garden of pleasure at a young age with one, special person allows you to express your sexuality healthily.
Sooner or later the temptation comes and this sureness of having a person to whom you can give and from whom you can take in the bedroom is safe.
Also, the psychologists say that people who have one sexual partner, are generally more satisfied with their bedroom life. And hey, you’re going to have this special partner very soon if you decide that getting married young is for you.
You Gain More Time to Grow Together
Marriage is a learning process and be prepared for the hard few months or even years.
The good news is, the sooner you start your education, the sooner you know just enough to understand each other without words.
Imagine that getting married young can allow you to get to know each other better and build your team very quickly. At the older stage, you will thank your younger selves for the work you’ve put in the very beginning.
I am writing this out of my own experience – after nearly two years of learning from each other, we achieved the point of “Ah, this feels lovely!”. And you can too!
You Are Settled
Stability is important – it makes us feel secure and in the right place. Imagine that you can have this stability early on.
Yes, maybe you do not know where you will live and you are still experimenting with your career path, yet you can have your darling with you already.
Isn’t it beautiful? The whole life might be a surprise to you, yet you will know certainly whom you will spend it with.
You can worry about which car to buy in the future, but you will not need to worry about much more important matters like whom to marry.
You Grow As a Person By Getting Married Young
Marriage is a huge responsibility and it requires a lot of patience, learning, and love.
There is nothing that has made me more mature than marrying Alex. You need to consider somebody else’s needs and think about another human being whatever you do.
This teaches you a lot of empathy and communication skills, and step by step you become a better person. Sure, you could grow as a single too, but marriage teaches you life and relationships way faster – because you learn from the other person and at the same time you teach somebody.
Your Sense of Responsibility Grows
As in the point above, you need to take care of another person’s needs – whether they are physical (who will cook?), emotional (they had a bad day at work and you want to comfort them), social (they want to go to a party but you’re not really in a mood), spiritual (you both would like a join a church), or pizzonal (pepperoni or margarita this time?).
Tending to another person makes you improve your responsibility FAST. You need to remember to let them know if you’re going to be late, you need to share and organize the housework together and manage finances as a team.
Not much space for immaturity indeed!
You Can Dream Big After Getting Married Young!
There is nothing sweeter than dreaming together. You can combine each other’s dreams into a unique mix.
Dreaming as a married couple is more powerful – two dreaming heads are more than one! Connecting two smart human beings can result in you both achieving crazy dreams sooner!
Motivating and encouraging each other is a fantastic blessing that getting married young brings.
Go on, take this big step to dream big!
You’re Unwrapping The Gift Without Waiting
God’s design for sex was to happen between a husband and a wife and this is one of the best blessings of a marriage.
You two are for each other. Do you know what a privilege it is? To have somebody’s heart together with their body.
Waiting is good and marriage should not be rushed. Yet, if you know it is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, go on and get married!
Marriage is full of gifts and sex is merely one of them.
Getting Married Young Is Awesome!
If you still need some convincing, I have to admit that marrying Alex was a great decision. Even if it was in the middle of Covid and I could not have the wedding with all my friends present, it was still worth it.
Love like from The Notebook, the honeymoon stage that lasts till today (after 3,5 years!), figuring out life together, adjusting as a team, and so on and so on.
But! I need to mention it not to discourage you but to simply make you aware. As far as it all is beautiful, getting married young has a darker side. Okay, not a darker side, but the thing not many people dare to talk about.
When I left my family and married Alex, other than all the positive feelings, I also felt incredible pain. I cut myself out from my previous life just like with scissors. For me, it was even harder because I not only left my home but also my country.
Do not get me wrong, you’re gaining so much getting married young! But there is a pinch of pain in it, too. Homesickness, grief, despair – you might experience these feelings, and by no means you’ve made a wrong decision!
You just love and become loved. There is so much good in getting married young, that it is worth this small ouch moment.
Really. Try it yourself 🙂
Comment One